Go West Young Man

This blog is particularly exciting for me to write today, we've been waiting anxiously to be able to share this. My faith is always challenged in the transition of a season when I desire to see the "writing on the wall" and I'm often envious of people who get that. I am shocked and thankful that God is evidently and unmistakably doing this in our lives right now.

We are moving to Colorado.

I will be the Director of Worship and Music at Calvary Bible's Erie campus in Erie, Colorado, just north of Denver. It has been a crazy and faith-deepening journey that has brought us and connected us to Calvary. We are packing and preparing for a cold winter move on December 18 and have already felt incredibly welcomed and reached out to by our new family at Calvary. We can't wait to begin a new season with a new spiritual family so close to our physical family and our roots. Colorado is our home and we can't wait to be close to a few grandparents. We can't be more thankful. I will be working at Calvary in a part time capacity to have the ability to tour as a solo artist, build my studio, teach students and continue recording my music.

We are thankful for the past two and a half years that God has had us at Grace in Indiana. We have met some incredible people and learned some invaluable lessons. Jenna and I are so thankful for the relationship and growth that we have experienced with these people, in our marriage, and our family. 

Thank you for rejoicing and celebrating with us.

Psalm 90:1 "Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the whole world,
from everlasting to everlasting you are God." 

St. Joseph, MI

While spending hours of preparation loading up the car with gear and diapers for a concert with a family of four inspires excitement and adventure, it's not the easiest and most stress-free way to tour. As I recently found myself rearranging car seats and wedging strollers between my road cases in the back of our SUV I remembered traveling with all dudes in a tour bus with a massive trailer packed with merchandise, gear and often a massive sound system. While I miss playing with a band of fantastic musicians, I prefer the small SUV with my cute little family.

Even better are the dates close to home. Several weeks ago I spent an early afternoon playing Tetris at the back of our MDX. Poor Gabby had to share her seat with a piano. Every time I have to move a keyboard I ask myself why I didn't choose to play the violin or guitar?



Even though the rain made the load in slightly obnoxious, we found ourselves ready for a great night with good friends. What better way to spend a rainy evening than with a group of friends at a concert?



Other advantages of having a show close to home is the ability to invite a network of cool friends. Always thankful for my friend and creative counter part Kyle Pierpont. Having a good photographer in one's inner-circle is always a good idea.









A one man show is tough and not my preference by any means. Toby Mac is probably the best example of this philosophy of business and has been very successful at it. He's the first to admit that he's not the most talented guy on the bus and purposefully surrounds him self with people who are better than him to make his concerts what they are. Any one who's seen Toby and the Diverse City band would see that. A band compensates for a player's weaknesses and potential lack of preparation. When you're by yourself, there's nobody to hide your mistakes behind. You also never get a break. There isn't a guitar solo that allows a few seconds to step back and drink some water and catch your breath, or a trash can ending to to give a few minutes to think of your next joke. It's also tough to remain entertaining for 80 minutes. When I'm hiding behind a keyboard, it's tough to visually stimulate an audience. I try to come out from around the keyboard a few times a night, but I always feel the pull hurry back behind my shield.




A band will come, but this has been a tremendously rewarding and challenging way to travel and play concerts. God has been so gracious to us in this, we've helped facilitate over 60 children sponsored this year. Considering the size of my typical audiences, this is a tremendous blessing.
If you've come to my shows, thank you. If you're thinking of having me to one, pull the trigger. Do it. Do it now. I can't wait and look forward to seeing you soon. Christmas is around the corner and I can't wait to share some Christmas music with you.

Collin

Gabby in Colorado

I flew into Midway airport yesterday morning and a good friend picked me up from the airport to return me to my quiet home in southern Michigan. I realized it had been over two years since I boarded a plane last. As I stood in line clutching my driver's license and thinking through the contents of my bag, paranoid that I'd forgotten to leave behind any renegade bullets that may have sunk into the recesses of my backpack it dawned on me how I change and adapt to my surroundings. Once upon a time I racked up the frequent flier miles and had air port concourses and shuttle bus routes memorized. Not any more. Now I'm the guy shrieking when the little puffs of air fluff up my hair in the full body scanners. What's happening to me? Traveling is good for everybody. (Blanket statement I know...) I really believe that. I still maintain that change for the sake of change itself is very good for us humans who's brains are patterned to program muscle memory and become complacent in our routines. Traveling reminds me of lots of things: who I am now, where I've come from, where I'm going, that there is a big huge world out there that doesn't revolve around me, that there is a perspective other than mine that I need to acknowledge. This was the first big trip with a family of four. Not sure what I think of traveling with a small family the age of ours. The infant is fine. Gabby's the tough one. She's so engrained in her little patterns and routines that altering her lunch schedule and menu by one small cracker half an hour late throws off her entire day. Add that to the stress of being strapped into a car seat for 20 hours makes for a grumpy little kid. I can't say that I blame her, I was her age once too and remember hating my car seat. Thankfully I got bigger. Much bigger. When she adjusted to her new routine of no routine she became her happy, bossy high-energy self again. Between concerts we drove through some of my favorite parts of the Colorado mountains. These are the places that inspired the songs of "Songs from Brookside." I look forward to showing you the videos I took of my new family enjoying these incredibly beautiful places. I did grab some still images that I thought I thought were adorable.

 



 We spent several days at Jenna's parents house in Colorado Springs. My horse trailer has sat as a reminder of a past life, slowly rusting in their field. I finally sold it today. My Proverbs 31 wife acted the part of a barter-saavy Mike Wolf and negotiated the sale to a cowboy from Omaha. My tribute to my horse trailer will come soon. :) If you really follow my blog, the answer is yes, everything in my life holds significance. If it doesn't, I throw it away. I got these pics of our cute little someday-to-be-cowgirl
 peering through the slats in the side.





 Jenna and the kiddos stay in the home country for two weeks away from me to attend the wedding of one of Jenna's good friends. I'm going to be so productive I won't be able to miss them. That's the theory anyway. So far I'm failing.

Breckenridge

A much needed change in our routine brought our little family to Colorado for the next few weeks for some shows, a family reunion and hopefully some family time. My EP Fight for Me released last week and this is the first run of shows that I have it with me. We've experience a lot of attack leading up to and during the past few days we've been away. Traveling with a family presents a new set of challenges and Jenna and I are adjusting to this new reality. It's no longer just the two of us switching off driving and only stopping for gas until we're at our destination...it's a little more complicated. Our little Cracken (Gabby) had enough of her car seat at hour sixteen of a twenty-one hour drive. Turns out toddlers also need lots of sleep and we've realized just how valuable her home routine has been to keeping her rested! Due to either the altitude of where we are in Breckenridge, or a bug she picked up, she's been a sick little girl battling a fever and hopefully a doc visit this afternoon will reassure her folks' anxious hearts!

Last Saturday we loaded up about 4,000 diapers, babies, concert gear and finally ourselves and left for Chicago to see some great friends. Once our Nashville family, God has moved us all across the country and our paths intersected in Chicago. Jonathan is a creative arts director at Willow Creek and David is a Brentwood, TN cop. We've more than doubled in numbers...how is this happening?





We are thankful for First Federated Baptist in Des Moines for hosting us and allowing me to join them for worship on Sunday. I'm always for some reason surprised and comforted connecting with believers across the nation singing the same songs to the same God. Common bonds are pretty neat.

Our journey has led us to here where Jenna's immediate family is off enjoying the Rocky Mountains. At least we get this view from our deck where I'm awaiting my turn at rocking the little ill one.



I haven't seen this mountains since I recorded Songs from Brookside which was inspired by the places we will see this week. Come back to my website throughout the next few days and I'll give you some video stories behind the songs and tell a few stories about this beautiful place.

Wish you could see it.

I'm Still Kicking...

Hey friends. I hope you haven't missed me too much. The last time I wrote to you was in May. This has probably been one of the busiest seasons I've ever lived through but God has been so faithful and done so many things I have to share with you. The last image I left you with was of my two delightful Blue Spark microphones in front of my Yamaha piano. For two weeks I tucked myself away in Brookside and recorded a full length solo piano record called Songs from Brookside in the small hours of the night when my babies were sleeping. It's available for download on my website, I hope you check it out.




If I could title a book about the past few months it would be, "Starting a Solo Music Career in Thirty Days: The Wrong Way to Do it." As a pianist first and foremost I've always lacked the project that represents who I am that says exactly what I want in the most honest and raw way I know how. This is Songs from Brookside. I've had these songs in my head for years without the time or capability to record them and now that I have one of these (capability) it was time. Every creative self-help book (trust me, I've read many because I need so much help) explains the importance of setting deadlines for yourself to accomplish goals and I had a natural deadline set itself for me.

Three weeks before Father's Day an opportunity presented itself for me to easily step away from my duties at Grace and finally having a Sunday morning off, I unashamedly invited myself to my good friend Jeff Castello's church, Crossroads Community in Goshen, IN. Jeff has always been a tremendous advocate since our introduction five or six years ago when I traveled in 33Miles and often stopped at Crossroads. Pretty awesome church. I've always wanted to have a CD release concert there but never had a CD to release...minor problem. With the time and excuse to promote a concert and lead worship with them on a Sunday morning I put the pieces together and Songs from Brookside was born.




Jeff connected me with LeSea broadcasting and simultaneously set up an interview at Studio B on the Harvest Show, a live Christian morning talk show. An awesome opportunity to share my music and share my heart for this new season of music ministry as a solo artist...something I never thought I would ever hear myself say. Check out clips from my time on the Media>Videos section of my website.




Well, a solo piano record is great, but the majority of my concert consists of me telling stories and singing songs about my family and what God is doing in my life. I'm so glad I finally finished Songs from Brookside, but with several shows lining up through the end of summer and into the fall I needed to track my vocal record and the day after my CD release concert I started tracking Fight For Me, my five song EP which I have been more proud to collaborate on then any other record I've ever done. This is not the $80,000 recording budget of my 33Miles records and on my shoe string budget I wasn't sure if I'd able to make something work and with the help of some awesome friends sharing .wav files over DropBox, tracking is finally done. I got the first mix back last Wednesday as I was driving to church and listened to it from my iPhone in my truck I laughed hysterically as I swerved back and forth and clapped my hands!

I called in a huge favor with Adam Silverman who I played with for years in 33Miles who now tours with Idol runner-up Lauren Alaina and he knocked it out of the park. My good friend Cal Joslin who plays bass for SideWalk Prophets tracked acoustics and bass, and Tyler Ewing played cello. Jason Hall, a friend from college is mixing and mastering and he is a magician. I am so honored that these guys believed in my project and offered to lend their incredibly amazing creative ability to make this what it is. I can't wait for you to hear this. These guys made me sound so much better than I do on my own and I'm so glad to have something that I don't cringe at when I hand people!

I've partnered with Jeff Castello more officially and he has been lining up shows through the fall, I seriously can't believe it. I'll debut Fight For Me on a run of shows to Colorado starting August 5 and I'm anxious to hold it in my hand and make people buy it. I hope it communicates how faithful God has been to me and how much He is teaching me utter dependence on Him.

Another major blessing in this new seasons has been our home base at Grace. Working with a pastor and boss like Jay who understands my creativity and supports my music ministry is a tremendous blessing. Pulling double duty keeping my worship arts, tech teams and now taking over more staff administration duties has been challenging and Jenna has been such a tremendous support giving me pep talks, talking me off many ledges, and held down the fort with a two year old and a three month old. Can you believe that? I'll post pics of my beautiful family soon because I have so many stories that crack us up daily with these little people that I know you'll get a kick out of, too. Here Gabby and Palmer are helping me edit vocals.



Alright. Best update I can bang out on keyboard in a few minutes. Can't wait for you to hear Fight For Me, I'd love to come and share it with you LIVE at your church!!

Collin

Songs from Brookside

My view from the past few days.




Songs from Brookside is a collection of solo piano songs recorded in my studio which overlooks a bend in Christian Creek which by Colorado standards is more like a river. I've heard there are trout in it, but fishing it is not the purpose it has in our lives right now as our time is filled with raising a family and developing a worship arts community. These songs are my way of processing our place in time today, and I look forward to sharing them with you.

I'll keep you posted when the record is done, but I'm shooting for the end of summer!

Alright, I Admit It.

That's right, I'm coming clean. The Swedish store which is the envy of all our small spaces has found a special place in my church stage. It always has. I'm not sure if it's the cute pictures that explain how to screw the thousands of pieces together, or the fact that the products last almost as long as my attention span. I just love Ikea. The beauty is almost exclusively in the low price of everything. When I walk in to the blue and yellow utopia I practically stifle shouts of, "YES, I'll take five of everything!!"

Last week I think I did buy five of every lantern to create our new stage set. This will carry us through the summer with a general theme of light and bright summer colors. Honestly, this stage rides a little too close for comfort to my personal guidelines of keeping it neutral and non-distracting. Just like our approach to worship styles, performance, and music selection my goal is to inspire and add to our worship experience while minimizing the attention on the band. With pops of bright red, chrome and a drum riser this is further then I will go in the future! Thankfully the lamps warm up the space and make it more bright and cheery than distracting.

My staging budget is only $100 per month, so changing every quarter allows me $400 per set and we've never exceeded it thanks to Ikea and a resourceful team.

















It's been an uphill road over the past two years building the worship arts team at Grace. Seeing more and more talented artists come forward and offer their gifts and time to engage our church in visual worship with each big project makes the long weeks so worth it. After finally finishing this involved set of engineering how to hang these panels from other panels, one of our associate pastors texted me Saturday night at 10pm. He asked me if the panels on one side were supposed to be on the floor of the stage. Answer: no. Thankfully my sister Linsi was in town visiting and after a long night of re-engineering how to fasten our panels we made them safe for Sunday.

There are two 1/16" inch cables running through pulleys fastened to angle iron on the top of the the white panels. This allows us to hang props more efficiently. Our new challenge was fastening the styrofoam lantern panels to the cable which is done by glueing two furring strips to the back of the styrofoam and running the cable through eye screws screwed into the furring strips. We crimped lead fishing weights to the cable to stop the panels from sliding down, but they didn't hold. After it fell we screwed the cable to the furring strip which seemed to do the trick.

My mockup ended up being pretty close!

Open for Business

One of the most important components for my studio finally arrived last week. Gabby was almost excited as I was and graciously "helped" me by standing on the box marked "fragile". Good thing she only weighs 26 lbs.





She was a huge help with my least favorite part: picking up all of the little peanuts. Why do they even make those? Answer: to entertain my two year-old. This killed a good thirty minutes of our morning while Mom and Palmer slept.



I don't think I'm alone in my need for an inspiring space to create. That becomes a challenge when an increase in kids creates a decrease in space in a rental home. Nevertheless I sunk my teeth into one of our spare rooms. Come on, I'll give you a tour.



This makeover cost me $15. This was leftover paint from work that was the wrong tint anyway, so I saved it from the trash. My boss roasts coffee and last time we went to the green coffee place I rummaged through the coffee sacks and picked out the ones with the prettiest pictures to create these isolation panels. I upholstered them to some 1/4" plywood over leftover batting that I found laying around. The curtains were on sale at Target which was the only real expense. Take that HGTV.





Also I can take a nap when I get tired from writing songs and stuff.

Some of my gear:

15" MacBook Pro, 2.4 GHz Intel Core i5 with 4 GB ram
Presonus Firestudio 10x10 Firewire PreAmp and Audio interface
Logic Pro
Mackie HR824 Monitors
Yamaha S90ES Keyboard
Yamaha MX100B Acoustic Piano (Predecessor to the U1 with a Disklavier module)
Blue Spark Cardioid Condensor Mic with the Blue Pop (I still need its' pair for stero recording)
Larrivee OM3 acoustic

I'm working on some fun projects which I'll be sharing with you soon!

Palmer Charles

I am a blessed man. As my family grows, I see more and more how graciously God navigates and guides us through seasons. Through each transition I am more overwhelmed and thankful for His generosity to me. First, God entrusted me with the most beautiful woman and Godly wife that I could ever hope to be partnered with. Then, two years later our lives were rocked with the addition of little Gabriella. As we prepared to ease ourselves into the terrible two's our lives were rocked yet again with the anticipation of another little one! Just when we thought we were gaining some traction and perceived "control" over our lives, God gently reminded us again that He is in control and has incredible things in mind.

Palmer Charles was born a week before his due date early on a Saturday morning on March 31. What an indescribable experience to go through with my Jenna. After nine months of restless sleep and lots of back-rubs the day came when we miraculously witnessed the split second moment of a person joining us in the world. It truly is indescribable, the formation of a beating heart inside the womb, then the few flutters of movement which gradually turn into visible kicks: undeniable evidence of life that only our Creator can give.

God wasn't lying when he said there would be pain in childbirth. I praise God numerous times everyday that I am not a woman and childbirth is a perfect example of this! It's so humbling watching Jenna willingly experience the pain of childbirth for the health and good of our baby. Jenna sweetly says that there is now way she could go through childbirth without me, but really all I do time contractions, hold her, breathe with her and whisper encouragement into her ear. Inside I'm gritting my teeth and wondering how much more of this I can handle before I yell, "Give my son the juice!"

The most humbling moment came after Jenna had been in intense active labor for several hours and had transitioned into the large jetted tub at the birthing center. The warm water worked like magic and allowed her a few seconds of relief between contractions. I knelt by her side holding a wet cloth on her head and letting her squeeze my hand. I timed contractions and constantly told her how proud of her I felt. As the contractions came on so quickly it was easy for both of us to feel out of control which is the toughest part of natural childbirth: purposefully losing control and letting the mother's body do what it was created to do!

As the contractions came on strongly and quickly Jenna felt overcome by them and even our Lamaze breathing began to lose it's effectiveness. In Jenna's worst moment of feeling completely out of control she simply cried out in prayer, "Lord help me, I can't do this on my own!"

Do you know how badly I want to be the one who cares for my wife and assures her that no matter what she can rely on me and I can carry her burdens? I wish I could describe how humbling it was to watch my wife intentionally experience pain and as it became harder than she could take her true colors showed and she went to her Rock. I hope that in my worst moment that I would turn to my Creator. Jenna taught me an invaluable lesson in this moment: in our hardest trials, cry out the Lord. Our suffering may not even be for our benefit (although in God's sovereignty we know that all things are). He might be doing a work in us for everyone else to witness. We don't know if our midwives were believers but they stood back and watched us labor together, and saw Jenna turn unashamedly turn to her God. I know they saw something different in my wife.

Although those intense minutes seemed like hours they ended just like that. Jenna told the midwife she felt like she needed to push and in a few short minutes we heard a baby cry and Palmer was placed on Jenna's chest. We both cried.

After the cord stopped pulsing giving little Palmer the last of his needed blood supply from Jenna, I told the midwife that I'm not the guy who needed to cut the cord, there are medical professionals for that. She laughed and generously stood in the gap for me.

The next few hours were perfect, we held our baby (Jenna) and slept (me), and our midwife bustled around our room cleaning up, taking temperatures and vitals from both mom and baby and let us rest. Within a few hours Jenna's strength had returned and after a quick picture with our midwife were on our way home.

Before:



After:









Although Pro-Life isn't an intentional theme of this blog, it's the most obvious message that Palmer's beating little heart shouts more loudly than I can. Palmer was a person from the moment he was conceived. God saw his unformed body. (Psalm 139). He will be inconvenient, expensive, and cause all kinds of trouble but He is made in the image of God and it's my privilege and honor to be called his dad and introduce him to his Heavenly Father. It's not our decision to avoid the 9 month pregnancy that his little life required, or to decide whether or not that little fertilized egg should have a chance, or a matter of women's rights. It's about a little person that God chose to breathe life into. It is worth it, all of it. I'm so glad my parents thought the same way about me.

Thank you God for Palmer Charles.

Welcome to my studio, Mackie!

In all sense of the word I've been a "professional" musician since I was fourteen years old and I remember my first paid gig well. Some friends who were a little older than me played in a classical music trio for weddings and special events and had a gig come up that they couldn't take and called me to fill in. It was a wedding reception at a classy bed and breakfast in Manitou, CO called the Cliff House. I thoroughly enjoyed myself for the two hours that I was supposed to play and enjoyed it even more when the event planner handed me a check for $250. That led to numerous weddings and receptions and then to a steady gig at the Gaylord five-star resort and hotel, The Broadmoor.

Even after years studying music in college and then having my albums available at any large music retailer I have always struggled with financially investing in my trade as a musician. Tools are necessary for our jobs as any skilled tradesman accepts. Even as a starving musician in Nashville I started a business with the cheapest start-up cost possible as a window washer. I went to Home Depot and spent $49 on two buckets, a squeegee and a pole and the cashier had to pry the cash out of my hand.

I'm slowly accepting the reality of adding to my musical tool belt and I bought this Mackie HR824 pair a few days ago and added them to my work station. These guys are amazing!

A Day in the Life...

When worship pastors are comparing notes one question topic that often surfaces is the logistics of our jobs which we all strive to systemize to make our lives easier. Worship and creative arts positions in average sized churches typically require an individual who is creative, organized with administrative ability. In my experience it's tough to find one person who exemplifies all of these qualities (I know which ones are my strengths and weaknesses!) which is why programs like Planning Center were developed and created.



There is a reason that Planning Center is the number one service planning program available today. It's (to put it simply), amazing. Short of actually being my brain, Planning Center is the virtual house that the logistics and administration of my worship ministry lives in. From all of my devices I can plan and manage services, schedule people, download and administer mp3's and charts for services, see which musicians have actually viewed them, track how long the service is actually taking, and so much more. Additionally, with Planning Center's accessory program Music Stand I can click a button and view my service plan, charts and mp3's on my iPad at my keyboard on Sunday morning.



Since our church can't afford iPads for all of our band, they are left in the dark ages with actual paper which isn't actually a negative, as I can't find a great iPad reader that works perfectly with my chart system.



I've been extremely proud of my musicians who have made the jump from traditional, completely useless music charts to the Nashville number system. With a small amount of music theory knowledge, any musician can pick up this system which all churches ought to be using. I will write another blog on the Nashville Number system with more insight, but there is a reason why this system is used and embraced by all music professionals in Nashville.

The only negative is that it requires me to print off two sets of charts, one for my band and the other for my vocalist. Those who are playing and singing look at two charts which takes practice, but easily mastered.



The vocalists lyric sheet is really only necessary for practice so they can take notes and learn their lyrics, but they are encouraged to use the stage display for any lyric reminders during the service so it doesn't look like they're reading.

Without going into a lot of detail the band number chart lists a place to write in the key and beats per minute for the click (these are the only things that can potentially change depending on set list), and then the actual chart. Each bar that will be played in the song is represented on the chart which leaves no room for excuses in the band members for not knowing the order of the song. Applying numbers to a scale in a key allows for players to transpose in their head and play the chart in any key necessary. More normal chord charts write in a chord letter ambiguously above a word on the chart which really doesn't communicate any information to the player. Number charts can be written as specifically as possible to notate grove, irregular chord changes and keep everyone on the same page. This is especially helpful for playing a brand new tune such as an original tune without a recording.

Your band might balk slightly at having to use a different system, but once they know and understand it, you won't want to use anything else. Ask any member of my band!

Seasons

This is Cash.



I've owned him for the past eight years. This is me roping off of him in high school.



My alter-ego is Jim Craig from The Man from Snowy River and I actually grew up wanting to be a large animal vet. God had other things in mind and I've held on to my horse pretty tightly. "Necessary Endings" by Henry Cloud is a book that I've been processing through and selling Cash was an opportunity to practice the reality of endings that Cloud speaks of. For whatever reason I don't let go of things very well and unfortunately for me, letting go of things is a part of life. As we read in Ecclesiastes, "there is a time for everything."

I'm a slow processor and am bad at "metabolizing" a past experience to learn from it as Cloud writes, end it, and move on to the next season. My goal is to preach about and shine a light on the things HE is doing in my life because HE is so intricately involved in every aspect of my life and I want His evidence to be known. (The point of this blog). This is me writing and metabolizing the reality that I don't always know what He is doing or what I'm supposed to learn. If you've spent any considerable time talking with me or reading my blog you know that most of the lessons I've learned in life and the metaphors in my vocabulary came from working with horses. This means I've either graduated, given up my credibility, or need to find new material for my metaphors.

Providing for and leading a family requires sacrifice and being a Christian requires giving up our lives - losing our lives to gain Christ. I know families and Christians who are literally losing their lives for Christ and sacrificing much; my loss seems small in comparison. I am thankful for God's patience as I even give up my horses to Him. Cash went to a great home on a huge ranch with other horses to a great guy who will love him, use him and eventually retire him. (Horse talk for shoot him. Just kidding, I promise I'm not that calloused, this is normal in processing endings, I read about it.)

Anyway, here's to twenty years of being a cowboy. I'm not giving up my spurs just yet. (I can't find them).



Now does anyone want to buy a horse trailer?

Cowboy Collin

Welcome to Grace

We shot footage for this video last November and I finally finished it this week. This is procrastination at it's finest. A common thread in many creative resources is that a true creative can create and drum up inspiration whenever and wherever and just be creative. I agree with this to a point as there are times when we are required to get a job done. Those who work in a creative field deal with deadlines and jobs that need to finished regardless of if the inspiration. Imagine a world where inspiration ruled: "Sorry, professor, I just didn't have any inspiration to write the paper." I also agree that having a deadline and routine outlets to create are great motivators which in a sense force us to create. I personally find the most enjoyment in my creativity, however, when I allow it to express itself and act when I feel inspired. My favorite songs, videos, drawings, and ideas all come from these times.

This video is no exception. At Grace we all wear so many hats that part of our day-to-day is doing a continual shuffle of priorities: the most immediate and pressing get done first and what can wait for tomorrow, or the things that are not necessarily in our direct field of expertise also somehow take a backseat! I've never considered myself a videographer and when there are charts to write, services to plan, and people to schedule, these elements often wait. Sometimes a long time.

I get to work with some cool guys. One of our associate pastors, Kyle Pierpont, is a photographer and captured these images of Jay and our congregation. My good friend Tyler Ewing writes source music for Guiding Light, As the World Turns, the Oprah Winfrey Network, and much more. Check out his company, Intrigue Audio to hear more of what this talented guy does. He wrote and orchestrated the soundtrack to our video, our pastor, Jay Klopfenstein shared our hearts at Grace, I slapped a few shots together and tah-da!

Our Little Girl

My camera has been on a sabbatical for too long. I pulled it out of the case and snapped a few pic of our quickly growing up daughter before my battery died...that's what happens when it isn't used more frequently. I get it, I get it.

I was sitting on the floor, following her around snapping pictures of her and she wandered over to the side table and sneakily grabbed my iPhone which she refers to as, "Baby." Perhaps we are sending the wrong message. After flipping open the case she began to scroll through my aps saying, "Peekersh, peekersh, peekersh," and nodding incessantly. She wanted to look at pictures of herself.



After I took her precious away from her to somehow discourage her extreme vanity she trundled over to the bench she stands on where she waves good-bye to me when I leave for work.



She then proceeded to blow me a kiss and say, "A-you!" (I love you).



There is some profound parenting lesson and experience in the middle of this that I haven't quite wrapped my mind around, but I'm thankful for these moments and the "peekersh" to remember them by which probably isn't helping the whole vanity thing.

That's okay. I'll toughen up tomorrow.

Or maybe the next day.

Think About It

Honesty time, I frequent Facebook often. I was a Facebooker before you could upload photo albums and it was restricted to colleges, and remain of the sect that thinks it should still be that way. This is actually quite dumb to say because as an adult well out of college I wouldn't even be allowed on Facebook. How about a spoon full of that sugar. Anyway, as we've traveled the nation and lived in numerous places we've developed many relationships that I thoroughly enjoy keeping up with and Facebook is a convenient, albeit contrived and sometimes shallow, window into their world.

I'm also the type that reads links that people share - if it's important enough for your status, it must be important enough to read and I find myself gleaning all kinds of valuable insight and wisdom from places like Huffington Post as well as very strange YouTube videos. Quite frequently, however, I run across a gem worth mentioning. I want to share a few with you, not necessarily due to the content of all of them.

Leaders differentiate from followers in lots of ways. One way I see among my circle is that followers tend to "jump on the bandwagon" pretty quickly. In Christian circles we see this pretty blatantly as trends come and go. There are many prominent leaders who come up with a catchy new way to think about our Christianity, or a niche topic like money and relationships and followers are quick to buy into their new way to think about it.

I'm preaching to myself here, because I honestly have fallen into this trap many times myself, and as I mature and grow in my faith I want to stand strong against the devil's attacks which we all know too well are often disguised.

John Piper and the Desiring God camp are a tremendous wealth of Biblical insight and have championed and I might venture to say, "popularized" reformed theology. I ran across this post on their blog by David Mathis entitled "Parents, Beware: Proverbs Are Not Promises."

Feel free to read the whole thing, it's not very long, but this is the first Desiring God material that I've read and honestly disagree with. Mathis states that we might reject the prosperity gospel as it applies to finances, but buy into the idea that if we follow a list of rules in the Bible there will be a specific outcome which he highlights here in the form of relationships.

He mentions a few Proverbs that offer a direct outcome if certain actions are taken, Prov 22:6, "Raise up a child in the way He should go and in the end he will not depart from it," and many others that sound a lot like promises. He cautions readers of the Proverbs to not read them as promises:

Now, we need to be clear here. The proverbs commend certain paths to family members because they reflect the ways God ordinarily distributes his blessings. But ordinarily does not mean necessarily. Excellent wives have good reason to expect honor from their husbands and children. Fathers with integrity often enjoy seeing God’s blessings on their children. Parents who train their children in the fear of the Lord follow the path that frequently brings children to saving faith.

But excellent wives, faithful husbands, and conscientious parents often endure terrible hardship in their homes because proverbs are not promises. They are adages that direct us toward general principles that must be applied carefully in a fallen world where life is always somewhat out of kilter.

As the books of Job and Ecclesiastes illustrate so vividly, we misconstrue the Word of God when we treat proverbs as if they were divine promises.

What? Most of the Proverbs are if-then statements which by definition are promises. If we can't trust that when God said, "do something, and this will be the outcome." Then we have some serious faith and belief issues.

It is true that following the letter of the law to achieve a desired outcome is not possible. This is not because the letter of the law is wrong, it's because we are people. Imperfect, sinful people. Mathis states that excellent wives, and faithful husbands will have terrible hardship. This isn't because Proverbs is wrong, it's because as people we aren't capable of being excellent, completely righteous people 100% of the time. It's not possible. My challenge is not the legitimacy of a God inspired promise, but in my ability to be perfect. Were I capable of raising my children perfectly in the way that they should go so in the end they would not depart from it, I believe that because the Bible says so there is a great chance that in the end my children won't depart from it.

The reality of our humanity is a huge humility pill we all need to swallow. I'm not perfect. I have already made numerous mistakes raising sweet Gabby and will continue to make many more even as I prayerfully strive to be the best dad I can be. It will only be by the Lord's grace that she won't depart from the Way as she's older, not because I did anything right. The flaw in Mathis' writing is not the Proverbs, it's in his view of man. This really surprises me coming from a Reformed Calvinist. Mathis' statement sounds like a "mulligan" for parents. "You can try really hard and be a perfect parent, but the Proverbs lied, your kid might end up a failure. Good luck." The problem is not the Proverb, the problem is me.

I feel like I'm on a rant and I apologize for that. I know that the scripture can stand for itself. It's lasted thousands of years without me defending it, but when I stake my life on these principles and find hope in my dark and discouraging hours, it angers me when trend-setting, spiritual leaders minimize and belittle the Word of God.

Psalm 119:114 is my thankful prayer.

"Your promises have been thoroughly tested, and your servant loves them."

Here's my point: Read and believe the Truth first. This is our filter and the lens with which everything that comes toward us must pass through. 1 Thessalonians 5:21 says,

"Test everything. Hold on to the good."

No matter the source, whether it be from me, your pastor, a good book. Test it. Let's hold on to those promises!

Strength Vs. Weakness

I have the privilege of investing in budding young musicians which is one of the more rewarding jobs a musician could have. I love giving private music lessons; seeing that light bulb go on when the stars aline and the "ah-ha!" moment happens. I've developed a teaching philosophy that's changed drastically over the years as I work with students with unique and individual learning styles. It's for this point alone that brings value to private lessons.

I've had over 13 paid, private music instructors which doesn't include producers and professional coaches I've worked with as a career musician. Don't do the math...it's a lot of money. Every teacher was different and had their own niche that made them "special", or the best. I've seen music teachers market their "niche" because they aren't versatile, nor do they ultimately care about the individuality and unique learning style of their students. A full time music teacher needs about 30-40 students to support themselves and it's easier to do the same thing with every students and develop a formula instead of catering to the direct needs of each student. This disappoints me because in my opinion, the value of paying for private instruction is two-fold: first, the information that's being taught, and second most importantly how the information is taught.

Think of it this way, if someone simply wanted to gain information, they could go buy a book on how to play the piano. A private instructor, on the other hand, should be able to make the information palatable and geared to the learning style of the student and more than spoon-feed the information, instill and share a passion for the skill that's being taught. It's the old teach a man to fish - feed him for a lifetime principle.

Within private music education, instead of matching a student's learning style with the correct teacher, I believe teachers should be better equipped and prepared to cater their teaching style to whatever the learning style of their students. A private educator ought to be an expert in their field - it's the point of paying for the education! By definition an expert knows a ton about their field and should be well equipped to help even an advanced student develop their craft.

This brings me to the main point of this post. We've all heard it: focus on your weaknesses because you're already good at your strengths. Musically this translated in my world to my teachers pushing me to sight read and not play by ear. Every teacher I had pushed me to read the music and as soon as they figured out that I simply needed to hear the piece played for me, refused to play for me because it was "handicapping me" from learning how to read music. To this day I struggle to sight read, I can do it, but despite their efforts to force me to sight read by refusing to use my strength, I don't really have a proficient ability to show for it.

All of my students have strengths and weaknesses and I've noticed a much more positive and effective way to help students with their weaknesses. Strengthen their strengths and find more creative ways to teach them their weaknesses. Often times a student's strengths will be strong enough to spill over to their weaknesses without us even having to focus on them resulting in the student teaching themselves.

Had my teachers done this for me growing up I would have spent more time developing and honing my ear and would have worked on developing my improvisation skills. Most of my teachers before college thought that the art of improv was simply an ability to make songs up without sheet music. When I got to college and had years of classes in ear training and improv I realized how much my teachers didn't know, or knew and didn't teach me. Instead of learning chord progression, structure and analysis in private lessons I was practicing sight reading which would have been awesome had I been a ballet accompanist, but my natural abilities and strengths don't make me an ideal candidate for this kind of job in the first place.

All this to say, one of my biggest priorities within private lessons is to help a student determine a direction for them based on their interests, passions and strengths. My job is to expose my students to opportunities and directions music could take them and widen their perspective. Within that, spend time developing and encouraging their strengths. As a career musician I am passionate and excited about music which should be contagious! If I can instill a passion and a desire to learn, a student will begin to teach themselves. If I simply feed information, a student will naturally learn the information and retain it long enough to regurgitate it to get me off their back! This isn't true and valuable learning!

I think these are principles that can be applied to our lives regardless of our craft, whether it be a mathematician, scientist, construction worker, or even a mother. Becoming self-aware is an important step and determining where we are in our walks with the Lord, where we need to be spending our time, and how we can grow and develop! We all should desire to be growing and getting better, regardless of what it is that we do!

Thanks for reading my novel!

Prof. Collin

Back to Creed

January has been a time to punch the reset button. January is December's veggie and juice cleanse which is probably more literal than figurative to many. As we all know January is definitely a let down month: the Christmas present credit card bills arrive in the mail, it's officially winter which means darkness and excessive snow, and the next big holiday to look forward to is Valentine's Day. Let's be honest, who really gets hyped up about Valentine's Day? Red hots are a terrible candy. Generally I think people's attitudes lean toward the negative side and we're combatting the winter doldrums at Grace by kicking it old school.

We live in an entertainment driven society that thrives on amusement. I'm not an etymologist so don't get all Harvard on me, but I do know how to use the dictionary: amuse is derived from the word "muse" which means, "to think." The "A"before it means "to not". Amuse therefore means "to not think." We're a society that thrives on not thinking. I find that kind of convicting yet very true.

This mentality finds it's way into the church where our congregations are well practiced in speculating and observing. From kicking back in the couch watching TV, to sitting in the stands at a ball game we're all great at watching other people do stuff. While worship is something we do privately, corporate worship is something we do together - collectively. It's a participatory activity. One of my greatest fears is worshiping in front of people who are watching, observing and spectating. What do spectators do? They commentate. Watch ESPN. They analyze everything: what the players are wearing, what they ate, even what they're thinking. Worship is not a spectator sport. Unfortunately there are churches and bands that perpetuate and encourage this notion by turning worship services int a rock show and may consequently leave their congregations and audiences behind them, even if they themselves are personally engaged in meaningful, authentic worship.

So this January we're pushing the reset button. Our band has worked hard and put in a lot of hours in December and they need a break and honestly the congregation needs a break, too: a change in routine, a change of pace. Have you ever rearranged your bedroom? Why? Have you ever painted one of your walls a different color? Why? We do this automatically and willfully in many areas of our life, but we are so hesitant in other areas where we might need it the most. We are people, we get comfortable and lazy. According to Dan Miller, (author of 48 Days to the Work You Love, speaker, with a background in clinical psychology) our brains are considered an "emergency organ" and naturally wants to "shut off" when not being used. You've experienced this with muscle memory. Our muscles remember tasks without us deliberately telling them what to do. He tells a story of a professor who practiced this theory on his students by changing their routine: locking the classroom door, stealing their note books and noticed that they creatively produced and excelled their best when he changed their routine.

This brings up an interesting question: is change for the sake of change itself good? There can definitely be negative change - change in a wrong direction that goes against Biblical principles, or that bring damaging or hurtful results, but small change that simply makes us think and disrupts our routine I would submit is very good. Jesus tells us in Luke 10:27 to

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

I want my mind to be widened and my brain to be activated to take in the wonders that the Lord is doing in my life and all around me and love HIM with all of it. I want to be an activated and engaged worshiper. My prayer is that as we engage in worship corporately that we turn off the entertainment, distractions, and focus our natural desire to be amused and allow ourselves to be brought into the presence of the living God.

How in the world do we do this? It's not that hard. Remove the distractions. Our "band" this January is just me and an occasional acoustic player, or perc player. Secondly, change it. Our brains activate when we're forced to think and our routine is changed. Change the stage set - it looks different and might inspire thought or a feeling that we might not have had if it was the same week after week. We're adding in some traditional elements of worship - the Apostle's Creed, the Lord's prayer: words that we remember and preach to ourselves that make us ask ourselves, "why are we standing in this sanctuary? Why are we all singing?" Most importantly, though, we go to the scriptures. Nothing inspires or motivates worship more than direct communication with the Lord. HE is the Word.

As I've challenged the congregation, worship is learned every minute of every day as we do all things to the glory of the Lord as an act of worship. (Romans 12:1) We must teach ourselves how to worship the Lord when we're not at church. Thinking and focusing on the Lord and His wonderful works 20 minutes a week is not enough. God doesn't want us to put on our church hat when we walk through the door, He wants our hearts, our adoration and our attention. As we give Him this, Sunday morning will simply be an overflow.

Feel free to join us. Reset this January.

Here's what it looks like to kick it old school at Grace:






These stained glass frames are styrofoam with a pattern that my buddy Eric created. We projected the image to a wall, traced the styrofoam and used a jigsaw to cut them out.